this castle needs better security
by finalflash1992
Summary: baaasically i'm gonna think up some sorta plot from other things i've seen and make this whole arc thingys till i get bored with em and move on rated M for safety, safety first children and there MIGHT be some vulgar language later on and sexual themes
1. Roxas in handcuffs

AUTHOR'S NOTE: and I am BACK baby! Who missed me?....nobody? bah, who asked you . anyway, kanye west is out, deal with it . lol, leave a review, I got no reviews last time, does nobody love me? T~T mehh, I'm good with that actually

Disclaimer: I own none of this, I don't imply to own anything, I don't even own the pair of Nikes I bought, so we even?

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roxas wakes up suddenly and starts breathing heavily

voice: hello roxas

roxas: Lindsey lohan? God, I thought we talked about this!

Voice: wha- no! my name is…oh wait, I probably shouldn't tell you that, anyway, I want to play a game

Roxas: like twister?!

Voice: No. like death

Roxas: oh. I've never played that…is it like hungry hungry hippos?

Voice: if hungry hungry hippos is like knives stabbing your body—then yes

Roxas: no, hungry hungry hippos is when you have these 3 plastic hippos and all these balls in the middle and there's all these kids around like "I'm gonna eat all your"

Voice: shut up!

Roxas: okay.

Voice: I should just kill you, but I won't, I'll let your fellow organization members decide wether you live or die

Roxas: whaddya mean?

Voice: they're watching you right now through the camera in the wall

Roxas: how long have they been watching…?

Voice: um, I dunno, maybe like 5 minutes.

Roxas: oh GOOD I thought they'd been watching all day and that woulda been bad…VERY VERY bad…

Voice: …..ok…anyways, I'm gonna give your friends 6 numbers 1 of them will free you, the other 5 will cause you more pain then you've ever seen before

Roxas: but what if they only pick a couple of numbers and then shut the computer off and go play outside and live in the real world for once?

Voice: trust me, they won't do that. Pick wisely children

Meanwhile, in the conference room

Larxene: push the red number!!!

Axel: blue, blue!!!

Demyx: hey, I was gonna say blue!

Xemnaas: ah screw it, let's just pick 4 and go out and play and actually live a life for once

Rest of the members: …… MUTINY! MUTINY! MUTINY!

Xemnas: crap, never mind, just…pick 1, ok, we've picked, let's hope roxas doesn't die in some crappy way like over-exposure to flowers or whatever like Disney would have planned… (xemnas turns to the camera) please don't hurt out budget for that remark

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Ok, SO I've decided to sorta spread this whole thing out through several chapters cause you know, I'm smartful like that, anyway, I'll come up with some final destination meets creativity Saw scenes and get back to ya


	2. this is only the beginning

Author's note: ok, so, I've decided to do 2 chapters tonight at least till I find another inspiration so, let's see what will happen to poor roxas!!!

disclaimer: i own absolutely nothing except the story i wrote, nothing used in it -.-

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Voice: your friends have chosen

Roxas: they're really more like buiness associates

Voice: …ok, your business associates have chosen your torture… you have to talk to this girl (the camera changes to a blonde girl in the corner) for 12 whole hours

Roxas: that's not so bad

Voice: she's the president of the twilight fanclub and Edward cullen fanclub and she's here to explain to you ALL 4 BOOKS

Roxas: OH GOD, NOOOO!

Girl: TWILIGHT IS THE BEST. BOOK EVER! OK, YOU HAVE TO READ IT, OK, CHAPTER 1, WHEN BELLA'S STARTING OFF SHE DOESN'T REALLY KNOW WHO SHE IS AND WHO SHE WANTS TO BE WITH

Roxas: MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!


	3. what have i done?

Author' note: I'm inspired for chapter 3!!!

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Voice: wow, you're friends got it wrong twice now, since they picked torture again

Roxas: dammit!

A guy in an FBI uniform walks up to roxas and shows him an Ipod full of miley cyrus songs before he put the headphones on him and turns the volume to maximum

Roxas: no, please, NOOOOOOOOO!!!


	4. whoa

Author's note: sorry I haven't updated lately, but I haven't had any ideas for the story and I'm not really sure about how well this one is gonna go, but whatevs, thought it'd be interesting to have you guys read :D

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Roxas: can I goooo yeeeet? How are you gonna top your twilight fan girl torture? Huh? Bring it on!

Voice: you know, I've actually been having a lot of trouble with that… I was gonna have Mariah carrey sing, but she didn't go for it

Roxas then notices the tv in the middle of the room

Roxas: oh my god, a tv! Yes, salvation!

Voice: what? Wait, don't touch it!

Roxas..of course… turns it on, and his eyes widen as he hears a woman scream, a blender whirring and water splashing then a loud horse neighing sound before the woman breaths heavily…and roxas turns it off

Voice: i…am so…sorry…you had to see that

Roxas: …

Voice: I'm gonna give you a break for now…umm… I'll see ya later

Roxas: he…the horse…the poor goldfish… it looked like a smoothie…WHAT IN THE HELL?!

Voice: don't judge me!

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Author's note: …yeeeah…this one just sorta ventures into the realm of over the line… but meh, leave me a review


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